Life should not be about changing who you are deep down. Coaching is definitely not about changing who you are. This may be a surprise to some, who are familiar with receiving the kind of help that demands you change your behaviors or insists you change your perspective.
As one of my own coaches said recently, coaching is really about making you feel ‘at choice’. In other words, good coaching makes you feel you have a choice. And good coaching also helps you discover and commit to the choices that honor who you are and what you love to do.
Unlike the common idea of compromise (often presented as situations where each side ‘gives up’ something in order to accommodate everyone), your life choices should feel like a win. Your choices should make you feel good. And while that indeed may mean you change your perspective as a result, it doesn’t insist that you do so.
What choices are you facing (or that you can construct for yourself) that will use your strengths? What actions can you take that will inspire you to live more fully within your values (remembering that what you value should be something that also makes you feel good)?
Coaching isn’t about changing who you are. Life shouldn’t be about changing who you are, either.
May we pursue our paths, choosing more of what makes us feel whole, connected, and valuable,
P.S. In honor of the fact that my book “The Concise Coaching Handbook” was accepted for publication (due out on my birthday in mid-July, a wonderful synchronicity J), I’m offering 10% off any of my coaching packages now through May 21st for anyone who has been thinking of writing their own book. Are you (or someone you know) longing to fulfill their writing dreams?